Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Exactly-Stupid Men. I even need to explain this one? Stupid Dad and Stupid Uncle Joe are driving a ride-mower off of a makeshift ramp in the backyard? Why does the mom appear to be like 50 years old and Dad and Uncle Joe sound and look like college seniors? Why? Because all men are apparently immature and stupid.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Stupid Dad Commercial old post

I stopped by my parents house to scrounge around for appliances I still needed, but can't yet bring myself to buy. For example, a coffee maker, power washer, and a leaf-blower (is that the proper name?). I sat down for a bit with my dad to watch 24, a shared favorite, and felt the comforts of "home" once again.

We channel surfed during commercials, only to catch commercials on other networks. Some of these commercials upset my dad. "Oh great", he said, "another commercial that makes Dad look dumb. Stupid Dad, can't you cook? Oh, there goes DAD again, taking the last piece of Little Caesar's Pizza. How greedy is HE!"

I almost always agree with my dad, but RARELY will I let him know this. I argue for the sake of arguing, especially with him. He has a tendency to "preach", like most of us Reeds. This quickly gets annoying. However, I immediately agreed with him on this one-WHY do commercials, regardless of the brand, always tend to make men looks like complete idiots? Even commercials that are directed towards men seem to put'em down. Does that actually sell products?

One of my favorite ones is for Yoplait Light Yogurt. You know, the "Boston Creme Pie, Apple Turnover diet". The woman is on the phone with a girlfriend talking about how she lost ALL this weight eating Strawberry Cheesecake and Key lime Pie. Meanwhile, you can see her boyfriend/husband frantically scanning the open fridge, pushing food aside and looking dumbfounded. Where is the Boston Creme Pie!!!!! Psh, STUPID man...your wife lost all her weight by eating Yoplait Light Yogurt-H-E-L-L-O!

I have a few issues with this. Forgive me if my philosophy of gender classes come out a bit. It bothers me that the man does not know what is/is not in the fridge. We can assume he is clueless because he never helps his wife/girlfriend shop. Shouldn't be know that there isn't any Apple Turnovers or Key lime Pie in the fridge? He probably spends all his time playing video games. Stupid man, I mean right? He didn't even realize his girlfriend lost weight..check out the end of the commercial. "Babe-what are you doing", she asks. Annoyed.


Another great one.

Yup. Of COURSE ALL women think they are fat. Of COURSE all men are sensitive to this issue. Please. 110 calories seems like the standard for 3/4 cup-1 cup of dry cereal. What upsets me is that the man is portrayed as being "stupid" about all of it. The woman sits there, chomping on her Multi-Grain Cheerios, as the man digs himself in a bigger and bigger hole. Until FINALLY, he says, "Shut up Steve". Ick, he even spoke in third person. I did not think this commercial was funny or cute. It's annoying.

Still waiting for Sonic to come to the Detroit area, but until then:

Thinking a shake is hot....stupid man.

It's great when adults play "clueless" with their kids. I did it all the time when I babysat this one family. The kids would hide when I came over and I would always say.."Hmmmm, where could Andrea be?". Is she under the table? Noooooooooo. Is she in the broom closet? Noooooooooo. Andrea?! Where are you?" I knew damn well she was always in the laundry room, hiding behind baskets of clothes. But you humor them. In the commercial below, stupid Dad is not "playing clueless". He IS clueless. Stupid Dad.

The next video I think I take the most offense to. Not only was my Dad a "Mr. Mom" (he cooked, cleaned, ironed my clothes, and even did my hair when I was really young). He was also the BEST night-before-the-project-was-due-come-to-your-rescue-kind-of-guy. I cannot tell you HOW many projects he helped me start and complete the night before. FAR from clueless.

Do I need to say more? I mean, right?

Monday, April 26, 2010

It's Not Delivery...It's Just A Supid Man

You got to love when grown men act like little kids. Eating in front of the television, dragging mud into the house, lying to their mothers...oh wait, that's the guy's wife? Yup, Stupid Men are at it again. Sports-crazed, couch potato, pizza eating creatures of habit. Everything is going according to plan until the wife (who acts more like her husband's mother) busts them! "Larry! (sigh) We just had the carpets cleaned", cried the wife. "Baby, it was the pizza guy", replied the Stupid Man. Ah, but the Stupid Man was clever-trying to fool his wife into thinking the (DiGiorno Pizza) was delivery! "Bread sticks?", the wife asked.."I guess there was a pizza guy", she concluded.

The Stupid Man and his Stupid Man friends all chuckled. They fooled her! Oh wait, no. She found the box-it was DiGiorno! Stupid Man left it on the counter.

Take away from this commercial: Men love pizza. Men lie to their wives. Men are not detailed oriented. Men are stupid.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Stupid Dad Can't Wait For Dumbo!

There is nothing that brings the family unit together like weddings, funerals, and family vacations. In this commercial, Stupid Dad cannot wait to experience the thrill of theme park rides (ironically enough, Flying Dumbo). He is so excited, that he cannot even wait for his wife to pull up the Mobile Magic app on Verizon. It's still unclear as to what the Mobile Magic app/service/page provides? Maybe it tracks Minnie Mouse or provides estimated wait time for lines at select attractions. Who the hell cares, Dad needs to be the FIRST on the rides! Why? Because Stupid Dad is selfish, immature, and impatient. Even his daughter asks, "Where's Dad going?"

Traditionally Dads are the ones that know best when it comes to matters of direction. I think back to the countless family trips my family took (before the days of GPS). My dad drove 90% of the way, especially through mountain chains, major cities, and at night. This was not an easy task-either my sister or I would be kicking his seat, my Mom would be bitching about how fast he was going, that he didn't use his turn signal, how close he was to the 18-wheeler next to us, and that it has been 53 minutes since we last stopped to use the bathroom. Dad always came through! That detour in downtown Atlanta off 75 South-no problem. Finding a fairly affordable hotel (that did not charge by the hour) in the hills of Virgina at 1am-he's on it! Dads just seem to have the natural ability to always know where to go. They can read maps easily, though rarely need to reference them, and always seem to take pride in saying, "We're almost there, kids!' He got us there-Dad.

I understand that gender roles within the "modern" family unit have shifted a bit. It's not uncommon to have a Dad that cooks dinner every night or does his own laundry. Mothers can kick a soccer ball outside with the kids and it doesn't seem weird. Did Verizon Wireless feel the need to deliberately showcase a Dad that has gone astray? The Mom, resourceful enough to use the Magic Mobile application, acts as the modern day Magellan. Clearly, Verizon portrayed the Dad as being childish, selfish, and independent. The kids are the ones that calmly stayed with Mom, as Dad ran off to ride Dumbo, alone. Stupid Dad, can't you wait for your family?

Thanks Verizon Wireless. Thanks for trying to "level the family vacation playing field" by making Mom the "smart, organized, and resourceful one". Thanks for showing a Dad that acts like he's 5 and the reaction of his family as they roll their disappointed eyes at him. (sigh) Oh, Dad.